One Night Stand With Singapore

I never thought that Singapore and I would spend our first night together wrapped in a nude embrace. However this is what happens when one neglects to pack ANYTHING of use in one’s carry on. I also never thought that I would be feverishly hiding gum in my cheek like I was carrying a contraband crack rock. This is also what happens when one forgets that one is entering a country where gum chewing is illegal. And this fact isn’t remembered until one is zombie-shly gnawing on the stuff in front of a police officer touting an ak-47 at 2 in the morning. Singapore is, however, one of the most eerily beautiful places that I have ever been. Everything is perfectly manicured and clean. Riding through its streets, it’s hard not to think of Disney World, where all the trees have managed to grow to the same height and malls have the audacity to stay open 24 hours a day.

             I have now spent about 2 days in Jakarta and I have one very profound observation. Indonesians, or at least the residents of Jakarta that work in fancy hotels, love R&B slow jams. Specifically Brian McKnight, Boyz 2 Men and Craig David. I know this because the lobby of my new home has experienced an almost constant rotation that makes me want to make babies or at least sip some Alize. I’ve been experiencing Jakarta in snippets and snatches. The early morning notes of the first call to prayer, the smell of sewage (powerfully reminiscent of my time in Chennai) and young kids running around yelling “halloo buleh!” (Hello foreigner!). There's a distinct possibility that I will develop acute asthma before I leave Jakarta on Friday.  Only those who have spent time in the smokestack that is Beijing  can understand the trail by fire that I am now putting my lungs through. Coupled with this fact, today I learned about everything, person, plant and animal in Indonesia that can kill me, or at least bring me to my knees at the foot of the porcelain god.

Next week Bandung.